Union Square Partnership Sucks

The Results Are In: USP Victory Over Activist Savitri Durkee and the First Amendment

blockchain 1/29/09 - USP is proud to announce that our costly, frivolous lawsuit against "activist" Savitri Durkee and her 1st Amendment right to satire has ended in a settlement whereby USP will acquire control of the unionsquarepartnership.org domain name, which would have only cost $9.99 at GoDaddy.com if we had bothered скачать моды для factorio to register it in the first place (or so our intern tells us). This lawsuit is just one of the many ways that USP spends the dues of local, member businesses to defend the vibrancy and energy of our neighborhood.

The settlement was produced on January 20, 2009 after great expenditures on legal fees, lawyers' billable hours and, of course, the time of our Federal Court System. Durkee, an activist from Reverend Billy & The Church of Stop Shopping, opposes the USP plan to turn the Union Square pavilion into an upscale restaurant. In our lawsuit, we alleged that the parody site she created infringes on the look, feel � and grandeur � of our site. Let all satirists beware that, as a public-private partnership, USP will do whatever it takes to spend other people's money in the defense of corporate interests.

crypto market With the help of the Electronic Frontier Foundation and co-counsel Mayer Brown LLP and Gross & Belsky LLP, Durkee and her rabble contested the lawsuit, suggesting that it was an attempt to "limit First Amendment freedoms in virtual space as ruthlessly as [we] do in the park itself."

Every Saturday at 2:00pm
Witness the whitewashing of history - come to our weekly walking tours every Saturday at 2 pm.

NEIGHBORHOOD HIGHLIGHTS

Union Square Partnerships
4 Irving Place, Room 1148S
New York, NY 10003
(212)460-1200

info@unionsquarenyc.org
copywrite 2008- Union Square Parnership
all rights reserved

	Union Square holiday markets crowd out public space to make room for profit This winter in Union Square, perhaps you felt like the holiday market took up more space than last year. Well you aren't imagining it! In 2008 citizens of New York experienced greater encroachment into public space by private ventures in historic Union Square than any other park! Our dedication to monetizing Union Square makes USP one of the leading advocates of the mall-ification of our city's resources. Here's to unfettered growth!
	Teen Steppers Carouse For Union Sq. USP would like to take a moment to apologize for the October 23, 2008 unlicensed and entirely free gathering of park lovers, activists, citizens, and quaint politicians on the south side of the Square. Upset about the privatization of what they claim is one of our nation's historic landmarks, these citizens rallied and made an annoying racket without spending any money at all. USP deeply regrets a moment of weakness when we couldn't help dirty dancing to the beats of 'The Approaching Storm', the sizzling hot teen stepper club out of Brooklyn.
	Intruders! Seize Them! Infiltrators At USP Gala The USP celebrated its annual Harvest in the Square gala on October 16, 2008. That evening, "activists" protested with bullhorns, banging pots and pans. Meanwhile, inside the gala, NYU Media Professor Mark Read and artist Marisa Jahn entered with tickets they legitimately purchased. In a shocking upset of market forces, Read commandeered the microphone midway through the gala and began indicting USP for "stealing" the "history" which his ancestors and himself have fought to keep as "public place". Our security guards shuffled Read away from microphone. Read and Jahn are now demanding a refund on their tickets.
	Community Still Yelling "Activists" continue to recite the First Amendment inside our vibrant and diverse construction site, hoping to reclaim it as a public gathering place, playspace, and significant significant site in the US social movement. Suckers!
	Greenmarket squeezed within inch of life Greenmarkets traditionally support local, small-scale agriculture and promote an 'artisinal' sensibility. But Union Square's greenmarket enables the urban blight of "public space" and drives down the profits of corporations like Whole Foods, who happens to sit on our Board of Directors. Therefore, USP must adjust our support of the greenmarket in that now we must destroy it, inch by inch.
	We Regret Purging Your Plant Life In response to the hundreds of agitated citizens who claim they love trees and other "living things", USP must admit that perhaps we should have explored alternatives to ripping out the 80 year old elm trees from the north side of Union Square. USP thought that planting new, young trees (the best our members' dues could buy) would be equivalent to the elm trees, until citizens pointed out that people have a sense of belonging when surrounded by nature older than themselves. As USP inhabits a soulless, gray realm of interchangeable entities that only possess value on a spreadsheet, you can understand our error.

Parody is Still Fair Use Last We Checked
Techdirt.com � 11/20/08 by Mike Masnick

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